Stop Posturing and Start Singing

We all know Joe. Quiet guy. Sits in the corner of the office with headphones on as to warn others, “don’t come near nor interact with me.” Mesmerized by Excel, his eyes barely engage with anyone or anything beyond his desktop. Quickly grabs the company-provided lunch and runs back to his workspace to eat alone. Slides out of the office at night with barely a “goodbye.” 

Hence our surprise when Joe arrives at Friday-night karaoke. Jaws drop as he enters the room filled with frightful singing. Hours pass, overpriced drinks consumed. Suddenly, a shock resonates across the floor. Joe is on stage with mic in hand! 

The intro music of his selected song begins to play, “she’s got a smile it seems to me…” Perceptions blown. Stereotypes shattered. Walls obliterated. Who is this man singing “Sweet Child of Mine” as a pseudo Axl Rose!? We don’t know, but want to.

I love karaoke. Kelly Clarkson, I am not. Far from it. In fact, I suck. Not trying to be modest nor fishing for a compliment. I really, really suck. Friends, family members and perfect strangers have commented on my earsplitting singing. But, because it’s one of the most vulnerable moments that we as sucky singers can share, I love it. 

Vulnerable. When did this word get such a bad rap? Weak. Susceptible to physical or emotional harm. Social media has only exacerbated its dire perception. People posturing everywhere. What is real? What is fake? What is merely a mask? More posturing, less vulnerability, 

When I reflect on my own 23-year career, vulnerability has been one of my key strengths. 

In 1999, I knew nothing about internet marketing. Nada. It was the age of AOL, dial-up and with Google still in beta, Yahoo! was the leading search provider. Yet, I was hired as a senior program consultant at a growing, affiliate marketing start-up called Be Free. How does one “consult” when he/she knows nothing about the space!? Naiveté at its finest. 

Despite my ignorance, I was assigned to Be Free’s largest client. Deep breath. Take a step back. Think, what DO I know? A previous stint in sales had showcased my ability to make connections with a variety of personalities at a multitude of levels. 

For the first three months of my tenure, I focused on “connecting” with the client and my new colleagues. Listening. Soaking up knowledge like a sponge. Admitting what I did and did not know. Asking for help. Saying the words, “I don’t know, let me get back to you.” In short, being myself. 

I knew mistakes would be made. I would screw up. Challenges would be faced. But, with strong connections, we would collaborate and successfully navigate them together. We did just that. Eventually, I was assigned additional accounts and a team to manage, which began my eventual rise to President.  

The best part of Joe grabbing the karaoke mic did not occur that evening. It happened on Monday at work. Headphones were off. Interactions began. Collaboration ensued. Connections were made.  

We all need more karaoke in our lives.